What is an anchor anyway?

It has been a long time since I have written. I have learned a lot of lessons since my husband died but they are hard to put into words.  In my last post I told a story about a seemingly small event that took on new meaning after he was gone. Similarly,  I learned that what I miss the most are what we might think are smallest of things.  Coffee in the morning.  Planning out our day.  Sitting side by side without talking while we read or eat or watch TV.  I have spend some time thinking about why these are the things that seem most absent.  I think it because these are the touch points of a relationship, a marriage, that give us structure, help us through our day, make us feel safe and comfortable. Our relationships structure our lives.  When you are married you are in everything together whether you know it or not.  So it is the ultimate structure in your life.  "I will water the plants. Can you walk the dogs?" "Are you getting your hair cut today?" " Ok, I will pick up the cleaning"  Small little exchanges and activities that move us through our days together even if we are not even in the same room or house.  Without them we float.  Since Victor died sometimes I feel like I float through the day and I am looking for my anchor.  What grounds us, keeps us steady and prevents us from drifting away?  Our anchor.  Sometimes in marriage we feel tied down, less free to move about.  But what I have learned is that marriage is an anchor and it gives you freedom, lets you move through life without feeling like you are drifting or floating.